Words by David Lovrien, 2013. Released to public domain.

On the first day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?
A bodhran player with a 3-foot club.
(spoken: he called it a tipper and I wasn’t going to argue. Very large man.)

On the second day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?
Two drunken singers
And a bodhran player with a 3-foot club.

On the third day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?
Three concertinas,
Two drunken singers,
And “shillelagh drummer” with his 3-foot club.

On the fourth day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?

Four floundering flutes,
Three concertinas,
Two drunken singers,
And a bodhran player with a 3-foot club.

On the fifth day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?
FIVE MILLION REELS!
Four floundering flutes,
Three concertinas,
Two drunken singers,
And a bodhran player with a 3-foot club.

(INTERLUDE – tune: Silver Bells)

There’s a fiddle in the middle
Can’t remember the tune
And I’ve heard better tones in the men’s room.
There’s a punter in the corner
Crying into his beer
‘Cause he wants us to play Danny Boy.
(spoken: Sorry buddy, maybe next set…)

Silver Spire, Silver Spear
Each tune we play has a name.
Earl’s Chair, I don’t care,
Turns out they all sound the same.

(spoken: Okay, let’s cut to the chase…)

On the twelfth day of sessions
Who showed up to the pub?
Twelve glorious banjos
Eleven pipers piping
Ten guitars strumming
Nine ceili dancers
Eight button boxes
Seven screeching whistles
Six fiddlers rushing
FIVE MILLION REELS!
Four floundering flutes
Three concertinas
Two drunken singers
And a bodhran player with a 3-foot club!